Locals are said to be reeling at the news that the four billion acre estate (about twice the size of Wales) surrounding the weepingly picturesque reservoir, Lake Vyrnwy has been sold to Satan, Prince of Darkness.
The estate, home to the rare Powys Birch Vole and several really peculiar mosses, such as Lembitus Opikii, was placed on the open market by reckless capitalists who are widely believed to have been attempting to make what City of London insiders refer to as “a profit”.
For months, anxious inhabitants of Llanwyddyn have placed their hopes in the possibility of a solution with a strong local component. A fighting fund was opened but, despite tireless campaigners organising two beetle drives and plygain carol service, the final total was a disappointing three guineas.
Iolo Williams had pledged a week of his repeat fees from S4C but even this vast amount could not match the coffers of hell.
Beelzebub is said to have spent several shooting weekends at the Lake Vrynwy Hotel, where he is considerably more popular than Hugh Grant. No mortals have any clear idea what the Devil plans to do with this beautiful part of mid-Wales. He has, however, confirmed that he is not planning large scale turbine developments, with a spokesman saying: “There will be no dark Satanic windmills”.
A spokesman for the local community council said: “It’s a shame he is not from Bala but at least he’s not a Murdoch.”
