Following global concerns about the safety of nuclear power stations after the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant disaster this week, we at Welsh Icons have been told of the Welsh Assembly Government’s plans, should a similar incident take place at the Wylfa Nuclear Power Station on the Isle of Anglesey or even the proposed Wylfa B reactor.
We understand that the subsidised Welsh national airline Ieuan-Air will be used to airlift all prominent local politicians and their friends and family out of the area provided there are no more than fifteen of them and that Prince William and his friends had not already commandeered the plane first. The bridges linking to mainland Wales would be closed to stop the locals fleeing in panic.
A spokesperson for disaster planning at the University Hospital of Wales told us:
“Can you imagine the carnage if everyone on Anglesey tried to cross those bridges at once?”
She continued:
“The best thing they can do is stay put and eat lots of lava bread, a well know source of iodine. Can you imagine what would happen to the gene pool if having been irradiated, they managed to make their way South and started breeding with the people of Merthyr or Newport for instance?”
We also understand that the Welsh Assembly in Cardiff Bay would be evacuated to Monaco where they would remotely govern Wales for the next six or seven million years.
Welsh broadcaster S4C would continue to transmit as usual and are hoping that in the event of a nuclear meltdown they may get their viewing figures into four digits for the first time.
All other residents of Wales would be advised to hide down coal mines until the radiation subsides.
We did ask Anglesey Council to comment on this article but apparently they were closed down last week.
Finally, when asked about contingency plans should an incident happen at the Hinkley Point station on the opposite side of the Bristol Channel, an Assembly officer told us: “That’s not our problem, it’s in England”.
