Wales to be mothballed until at least 2025

Following yesterday’s announcement that the proposed Severn barrage scheme is not going ahead, and today’s news that the Defence Technical College at St Athan in the Vale of Glamorgan has been cancelled after over £100 million of public money has already been spent on it, Welsh Icons has learnt that the country of Wales itself is to be mothballed until at least 2025.

The news leaked prior to tomorrow’s spending review comes on top the news this evening that the BBC is to take charge of the finances of the beleaguered Welsh language television channel S4C.

Welsh Icons have been told that Welsh celebrities who remain in the country will be evacuated during the run up to Christmas. Our source added: “why do you think that fit bird got the job on the One Show”.

Many Welsh legends such as Sir Tom Jones, Huw Edwards and Dame Shirley Bassey were ‘tipped the wink’ years ago and now live abroad.

We understand that remaining stars such as Derek Brockway, Manic Street Preachers and that Welsh bloke who came third on the X-Factor a few years ago are to be secretly air-lifted out of Wales in the last operation carried out by Harrier Jump Jets before they are decommissioned.

A source within the Welsh Assembly Government told us: “The closing of the Newport Passport Office was just the start. In January both Severn crossings will be closed and Wales will be left to its own devices until the economy improves”.

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